What would your suit do?

I finally went to see Iron Man 3 last week (which was RAD & should be seen by all). One of my favourite images was of the large variety of suits Tony Stark had built during some sleepless nights. Inevitably though, it sparked post-cinema pub debate.

So now I put it to the web: if you could make an Iron Man suit that did anything, what would it do?

We’ve seen different versions throughout the Marvel universe both on screen & on the page since the character first appeared back in 1963, from the original grey & gold suits through to the stealth suit, War Machine, Hulkbuster armour & Prometheus armour. As the conversation went on, I realised that the suits that had been created (and doubtless will continue to be created) by the geniuses at Marvel were at a level I could never hope to achieve in my mind.

They would also be almost entirely useless to me.  Having ablative armour that will protect me against parasitic alien life-forms would be cool, but ultimately not something I’m likely to need more than once in this lifetime. So what if we went the other way: the more mundane the suit the better.  Skyscraper Window Cleaner suit would be practical & fun, whilst Disco Iron Man would take club nights by storm.

So here are the first few ideas we had. Let us know what suit you’d build.

Disco Suit

• Mirror ball head


• Disco lights throughout body


• Extra smooth joints for extra smooth moves


• Speakers throughout suit


• Fishbowl shoes

Beach Buddy Suit

• Sunscreen dispensers & applicators


• Biodegradable parasols


• Dispensable water aids


• Personal floatation device


• Bucket head (multiple layers)


• Spade arms (multiple loads; can also be used as projectiles)


• Towel dispenser


• Shower/hose/hairdryer arms

Babysitter Suit

• Instant bottle maker/warmer


• Nappy changing device


• Nappy disposal unit


• Extra soft arms to rock babies to sleep


• Complete with pre-programmed lullabies & bedtime stories (with character voices)

Skyscraper Window Cleaner Suit

• Controlled flight using feet only


• Water jets


• Cleaning solution jets


• Buff & shine hand pads

Desert Survival Suit

• Tan camouflage


• Heat resistant


• Converts sweat into drinkable water


• Solar panels

Mr Whippy Suit

• Ice cream jets


• Flake dispenser (also work as projectiles)


• Sauce jets


• Sprinkles shots


• Pre-programmed with traditional chimes

Recycling Suit

• Auto-splits recycling
  
• “Digests” materials & reduces to core elements


• Releases gases into reusable canisters (fuel)


• Ejects pellets to be built into new items

What would your suit do?